Middle Roof

Saturday night.  I love quiet Saturday nights.  I like to be in my home, with a good book or movie, a lighted candle, and peace.

Tonight is no exception.  But this week I have definitely earned my respite.  This week I can only lay on this couch with the combined assistance of acetaminophen and ibuprofen. Today I look like Samwise Gamgee at the end of The Return of the King. I have a severe red/brown tan line on both legs about 6 inches up from my ankles. The rest of my legs are pale and full of bruises, deep scratches, and grime. My finger nails are full of tar and grease and I can't get them clean. My face is deeply tanned and sunburned and peeling.  I have had little sleep and I have wandered through the days, sometimes, in a mental fog, but always with sheer determination and stubborn will.

I did not spend this vacation in Middle Earth but instead, I worked toward putting a new roof on my house.

I learned much. I cried a little.

First and foremost I learned: you do not tear off the old roofing wearing shorts.  It is imperative that you follow this rule. I wear shorts one day out of every year; gung ho to not have those attractive tan lines, I decided that day for 2020 was day one of this project. This poor decision yielded what we would go on to loosely term, fiberglass butt. Are you familiar with fiberglass?  I was not too familiar but I find I am now well versed and will add this to my resume.  After 5 hours of digging off shingles and tar paper, I learned a few things.  Fiberglass is slick as snot. Those particles are like marbles under your feet. When your legs are tired and you sit to work, those particles dig into all your pores and scratch your skin as you constantly slide down the roof. The end result of hours of removing shingles and sliding around in fiberglass is this: your thighs are burning, every muscle is aching, as you lower yourself to the toilet to relieve yourself ten thousand knives simultaneously pierce
your skin. That is fiberglass butt. It will remain with you for days. (Do you know how much time you spend on your buns if you are afraid of heights and are roofing?) You will never forget what it feels like.

I wear these tan lines like a badge of honor because I purposely did not put another pair of shorts on for the entire project.

We rented a 35' boom lift which saved our lives. The kids were able to help get the shingles and boards up to the roof without us expending more energy.  We had a lot of water damage and it took a lot of time to replace the boards.  Noah was a pro on the saw and it was such a joy to work with him and see what skills he learned in tech.  When he speaks about how to proceed with the saw, it is with clarity, authority, and logic and I follow his lead. Ryan stayed up on the roof and the boys and I worked together to get the cut boards into the lift and up to the roof.  Our neighbors sat in their pool and stared at us all day. I was never so envious of their pool as I was on this day.

We encountered several days of scorching heat which delayed our project.  On Tuesday about 4:00, I started to feel unwell. We are laying shingles on the backside upper roof at this time. Our home faces east so this means we are now in the the direct sun at the hottest part of the day. I know we only have so many workers and so many days; I try to talk myself out of it.  But within minutes it is all I can do to get the strength to crawl up the roof and throw myself onto the other side and sprawl out. It is a good 15* cooler on that side, and I find all I want to do is throw up about 4 times and go to sleep. Maybe eternally. Aaron is in the boom quick on the drinks but we have run out of water bottles and I am offered a cherry Coke which I take without hesitation and suck down.  (I hate cherry flavored anything.) I hobble to the lift and Aaron takes good care of me for the next 30 minutes.  He puts his arm around my shoulder and tells me all the way to the ground that I am doing a good job. He helps me inside and gives me specific instructions for heat exhaustion.  He is so conscientious and again, like Noah, authoritarian.  I wonder who raised such good kids and when they grew up to tell me what to do.  I made it through and went back up to complete the day.  I prayed multiple times that God would grant us cooler weather on Wednesday so we could get ahead in the project.  The kids and I sat joking that we were the entertainment of the street as our neighbors across the street sat in their front yard watching us. When one guy left, Aaron quipped, "Well, there he goes for the popcorn."  I got Noah to perform a little macarena with me and I think they enjoyed it.

Wednesday was just as hot.  As I sat with Noah on the roof about 4:00, facing the street, I said, "Well, Jesus, I guess it was a hard "no" on the weather shift, huh?" Within moments, I watched two cars pull up in front of my house and three grown men piled out.  God's response, "Daughter, I love you more than a mere weather shift.  I want to give you the better gift. I am providing you with unexpected help."  And I sat on the mountaintop and cried.  Just a few salty, grimy tears but with a heart full of gratitude.

It was just the encouragement I needed to carry on.  We still needed to do the entire lower roof, including replacing boards.  I slept only three hours that night because I kept dreaming I was falling off the roof, but I was at Lowe's at 6am to get supplies and a sweet tea to treat myself. We worked so hard that day. The kids and I did the drip edge, underlayment, snow/ice guard, and the starter shingles while Ryan and a teammate did the boards.  I pushed and pushed and pushed, I did not take a break all day.  My will is very strong, my friends, and I kept repeating this line I read: "A man who is a man goes on until he can go no further - then he goes twice as far."  My body is pretty broken and my mind is going, I started making stupid mistakes because I just can't concentrate.  Aaron was helping me cut and I realized I cut it way too short and I look into his eyes and I'm trying to keep from crying.  He instantly understands and his look of deep pity goes straight to my heart.  He whispers, "I'm sorry, Mom" over and over.  I take a minute to let the exhaustion and stress leak from my eyes.  Noah reaches over from the other side of the roof and pats my arm. I repeat to my kids for the hundredth time this week: "You can do hard things. You keep going even when you want to give up."  I take a deep breath and plunge onward.

Friends...with the help of others, cooler weather, and strong determination...we finished on Thursday night at 9:20. 

I am still recovering.  I might have some PTSD. It was the hardest thing I have ever done. Physically for sure. Maybe also mentally.  But the sweetest memories of working alongside my family live forever. My kids were amazing. My husband taught each of us some skills. We took time to learn, to joke, to have some fun. We only got through this project as a team with all members pulling some weight.  We depended on each other and the other teammate always delivered.

That kind of fulfilled trust, binds.

I am so proud of us.

I have fiberglass butt, burns on my thighs from the hot shingles, dehydration, sunburned skin, parched lips.....and joy.

Because Frodo and Sam had each other at the end of all things.

And I have Ryan, Noah, and Aaron.  ❤️