February. I welcome you. For this January was the longest and darkest I have known in some time.
Not all seasons of this precious life are brimming with happiness, cheer and goodwill. Not all seasons have laughter, banter, and blessing. Some seasons require daily or hourly attention to the course in front of us. Put your foot here. Put your foot here. Jesus, help me to keep doing this thing called life. Give me strength. Meet me here. Jesus, I need you. This is my January season. So long it was.
What I can appreciate about these seasons of life.... What gives me hope... The people who meet you where you are. They bend down to your stooped level, they look in your eyes, though you are desperately trying to look elsewhere because you are ashamed, and they stay. They agree that it's not looking so great in this place. They serve you when you cannot serve yourself. They care for your heart when you have forgotten how. And unselfishly they stay.
I have had doctor appointments in the double digits for the past 8 weeks. My personal space has been violated repeatedly. Just one blessed time I would prefer to keep my clothes on thank you very much and I would prefer not to be manhandled with instruments, hands, and knives. I want all the people to stay three feet away from me for the next two weeks. I understand health is important. I understand the need to endure such times. But as I became a middle aged person all I could see was: "This is my future. For the next years that God gives me, I'm never going to get to keep my clothes on." Colonoscopies, mammograms, cancer screenings, blood work, stress tests, ultrasounds, physicals... I'm currently over it and it's just going to be that way for awhile.(Thank you, Jesus, for my life, I do treasure it even though I am exhaustified.)
It's been so discouraging. I've been really, really low, which is atypical of my nature. I have to encourage myself to get to work. Maybe you can get a cookie..? I have to encourage myself to get to church. Maybe you can get a coffee?
Such times come to each of us. None of us are without trial. I hope you have people that meet you in the Not So Great place. I hope you have people that stay. To be chosen during such a time speaks volumes. By their actions, someone says, "I know you cannot reciprocate but I am giving to you anyway." It's such a powerful thing to serve the broken. You will be immeasurably blessed to give without expectation to receive. And, to the person who cannot give back, you will have changed the course of their day or possibly their life.
February we're glad to see you. We're glad to know that no season is permanent this side of heaven. We like for the good seasons to stay a long while and the low seasons to exit quickly, but there are no guarantees. We lift our cup of tea in honor of the broken everywhere. We lift our hearts in thanksgiving for those who choose to stay.
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