Conditioning

 Gentle readers....

It's been awhile. It's been just a little while since I have jotted some ideas down on paper. You know how I have longed to be a writer and you might respond, "If you are writing, you're a writer."  I think I desired it to be more of a profession, something I could pursue with a bow toward influence.  I am not certain how many people want to camp at my feet and listen to my tales, but I could see myself as a speaker. I think in order to pursue this line of work, within your scope, you must have an indefinite supply of material. In a frank conversation with myself, I determined that I don't have that. Words are not always with me, not all moments are for sharing, and I do reach a place where there is silence.  

I'm emerging from this quiet place, to peer out and say a few words today. 

Being a person of authentic nature, the first things I want to say are: "Put down the pizza slice" and "Don't get out of shape physically." Paying the piper at the end of the line is no fun. You should hear me huffing and gasping for breath while Autumn puts me through the wringer, and, under my breath, because I can't actually verbalize anything, I'm cursing every slice of pizza known to man. Also, I can be found trying to determine how the entire body is supposed to side balance on the forearm  and a toe and then dip down to the ground and go back up again.  What voodoo sorcery is this?  If my weight is being held up by my tiny toes and my broken shoulder is a "supporting" cast member while my butt is headed toward the ground, then it,  and all the weight in the middle, is just gonna stay there, it isn't going back up. For the love, have you ever? This just isn't the type of stuff you can do if you consume pizza.  These are the days of our lives.  My life.  Desk jobs wreak havoc and my neighborhood constitutionals, well, that's just not quite doing the trick.  I say again, "Don't eat pizza if you don't want to be the one following the 'modifier' which in video exercise jargon means 'the one who is less than or, essentially, out of shape.' " 

Life moves forward in Texas. We recovered from the winter storm, fixed the things that were broken; and, cut down the magnolia tree, shrubs and palms that were not salvageable.  I'm a little sad because I was quite excited about palms in the landscape.  I imagine you won't be able to get your hands on one this summer. We'll see.  Soon we'll be swimming often and wishing for more shade to hide from the sunshine. 

I've been reflecting in recent weeks about condition. Condition can be defined as an "existing state," and it could relate to a variety of nouns.  We have talked about my physical condition which clearly is existing in a "modifier" state.  We can talk about the state of our beautiful country; long may our rights and freedoms stand, which were bought with the blood of patriots that even yet might cry out from the ground - "Give me liberty or give me death."  Forever in peace may Old Glory wave.  America, you are beautiful, and I love you. I am proud to have served you as a patriot and I am proud to be branded a daughter of this nation that allows me to pursue life, love and happiness.  

It's the condition of men that I dwell upon most in these quiet moments and some of that correlates with the state of our beautiful country.  I see hardness settling into the bones of man. A hardness that is difficult to reverse. I see a hardness developing in myself and I call attention to it. There is a key difference between firm and hard. You can be firm in your values without being hard; I see that line blurring around me and sometimes, within me.  It can be difficult to divide right and wrong.  It can be difficult to discern. It can be difficult to know your enemy. My friends, gentle readers, when we find ourselves unable to know, it is perilous indeed.  I pray continuously that God will soften hearts. My heart. The hearts of my son's. The hearts of mankind.  We need God. Oh, how we need God to change lives. Please, Jesus, let me hear your voice. The voice of Truth over everything else. Give me discernment. Help me be salt and light in a world that daily, increasingly, does not want light.  Show me how I can do it better. I am growing unable to bear what I see around me.  Help me be soft in heart. To you. To the world you came to save. Whatever else I am purposed for, I am made to stand in the gap and represent Jesus to the condition of men that is hardening.  

Whatever small corner I am in, I still have a sphere to influence. I don't need a stage. I don't need a book. I need only to speak truth and love.  Love travels faster than the speed of light, no? And you know what spells love? P-I-Z-Z-A.  And thus we have come full circle. Catch me outside and we'll share a slice and chat. Because I love pizza and people.  I do my best work here.